once had friends mercilessly fail three attempts at making me a birthday cake before realizing they’d been using diatomaceous earth in lieu of flour the whole time
I gasped with greater intensity than I ever have in my life
not even cynically, it’s hilarious that when I went back to the orthodontist years ago after biting one of the metal bars off my retainer in the night, instead of saying ‘hmm, maybe you need a mouth guard for bruxism’, he goes ‘actually you don’t need these bars for the retainer to function properly’ *snap* *snap* ‘here I got rid of the pointy metal stub and took the other bar off. keep wearing it every night. goodbye’
